Dementia and my mother

I never imagined I would lose my mother

Day after day

moment by moment

For something called dementia.

I imagined that we would have quiet times

Who remember

From playing Table games,

But a robber stole and claimed to see her

And she went puzzles

Scrabble Games

So crazy 8.

Next to the go was her memory.

"Why am I here in this place?"

"When can I go home?"

"Where are my things?"

"I think I own this building, he inherited it."

"Do you know where my room is?"


"Why can not I go with you?"

Because you can not walk, you're in a wheelchair.

"Yes, I can"

Mom needs help to go to the bathroom

To get in and out of bed, it takes two people

"Your father was here, slept with me last night"

My father has been gone for almost 20 years

But they told me that I only agree with her so as not to bother her

But it bothers me ...

Its wheelchair is limited by clouds days before

Sleep or go out to the sun "to absorb"

"I'm glad you're here," she says.

Every day the same, but a little different

The meals you do not remember

At the time of day has no idea

Wait, I wonder why they are still alive

"I told you I would not hang around, but I'm still here"

OK, Mom, we're glad you're still here.

It was ripe for some time. Since last fall, she has been hospitalized and discharged from various injuries, and we thought she died in March when her blood pressure dropped and she contracted another infection, but she overcame even without medication. The problem was that they were no longer able to walk on their own. She needed help for a while and I was staying at her house 24 hours a day, seven days a week. It is time to make a change in a nursing home. We did the papers and then we waited. She had to stay in hospital because she could not go home. This means that we had to clean up her room - with many things that did not fit her new room - cabinets, chairs, tables and electric beds. The family took everything they could, but we provided the rest.

My sister lives 5 hours away, so try to come every other weekend that helps, but the main care falls on me. I feel guilty if I can not enter every day, although I know it's safe. There are little things that are not done, and they do not have time because they have a lot of people to take care of them. I worry about what will happen to me when I am 98 years old. It is time for the government to pay more attention to higher health care.